Happy Valentines Day, Dumbasses!
Tens of millions of you will be giving gifts to that Special Someone. And for all you Dumbasses, that Special Someone will be getting off the short bus later today or will be released from The Home for the Criminally Stupid on a day pass. Regardless, you’ll want to shower them with gifts of chocolate, flowers and maybe even a night out at your favorite restaurant.
While all the gifts mentioned above are fine and dandy for Ordinary People, being a Dumbass means going the extra mile when it comes to gift-giving. And by “extra mile”, I of course mean “leaving Mommy’s basement” and buying a “unique” gift for your Dumbass Valentine.