Lady Hits Lotto for $550,000; Gets Drunk; Flushes Ticket Down Toilet!

Do you play the lottery?

I used to play the Wednesday and Saturday Lotto games in Texas every week. At a buck a ticket, why not?

Two dollars is a small price to pay for a Life of Luxury, Leisure and Financial Security, right?

While we didn’t have the Super Mega Bucks Rich Ass Lotto game back home in Texas the last time I lived there, the Texas Lotto jackpot would regularly reach into the $30 – $40 million range. Two buck for a chance at that much cheese? I’m fucking all in, Dude.

However, $30 or $40 million ain’t shit.

Some of the Mega Bucks Rich Out the Ass Lotto jackpots have recently have been in the half billion dollar neighborhood.

That’s. Five. Hundred. Million. Samolians.

Of course the odds of winning a payout like that are about the same as Michael Moore schtooping Jessica Alba.

Anyway, with 500 Extremely Big Ones, I’d buy lots of land, build houses for my family, buy cars, travel like a boss, make some substantial charitable donations…the usual stuff.

And party.

I’m sure my wife would allow me to start drinking again. If I chose to drink myself to death, she’d have 500 million reasons not complain about it.

Besides, with all that loot, she could travel the Globe and would never have to step foot on Dumbass Dome property.

Whether I am dead or alive.

See?

The shit works out right.

Read the rest…..

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