Zoo Emergency Drill! Guy in Gorilla Suit Shot W/Tranquilizer Dart!

My two youngest kids are 7 and 11 years old.

Neither of them has ever been to a zoo.

I live in Augusta, Maine and I’m even sure where the nearest zoo is located.

Portland maybe? Even if that’s the case, The Peoples Republic of Portland is sixty miles away. On top of that, for a round trip from here to there and back, I’d spend almost $20 on tolls just for the privilege of using Interstate 95.

Fuck that.

If my kids wanna see wild animals up close and personal, we have Animal Planet and Nat Geo Wild on our cable system.

Or, they could grab a lawn chair and sit out front and observe our neighbors.

I’m just sayin’.

Read the rest…..

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