Sometimes the small town newspaper accounts of Dumbass Crimes are funnier than the actual crimes themselves.
It is for that very reason that I spent hour upon hour scouring the police blotters in small town periodicals from burgs dotting the Fruited Plain.
Of course by scouring “hour upon hour” I mean “a quick Bing search of the internet” for material for today’s post, which took damn near 26 seconds.
The Fruits of My Labors (all 26 seconds of it)
Good thing the cat’s name ain’t “Fuck Face”.