Things are swirling around the ol’ Porcelain Pony these days at the Dumbass Dome.
Over the last week, each member of the First Family of Dumbassery has/is/is again experiencing symptoms of The Crud.
The Crud is a debilitating disorder that manifests itself with any or all of the following maladies, individually or in sadistic combination with one another:
- A “croupy” cough that sounds like a flock of caffeine-laden Canada geese with emphysema.
- A headache that feels like someone is pounding you about your skull with 16 pound sledge hammer.
- Sounds resembling a Mack Truck diesel engine eminating from the stomach-ular region.
- Nausea of the kind you would get if you chugged a quart of Liquid Plumber.
- Chunky Style Projectile Puking.
- Anal emissions that mirror a rancid chocolate milk-battery acid milk shake. This is known as Ass Effects.
In short, that is The Crud.